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Chapter 1 being played, he knew it, but was it really so terrible? Hayden was so sweet, so kind - so naïve. And he'd always had feelings for Theo, the elder man knew that. How could Theo tell one of his best friends that he'd starting falling in love with him - after two years of leaving him waiting? "The'?" Hayden asked again, his voice husky now, shifting closer still. "Hayden," Theo dared to say, ready to spill it all. To stop trying to protect Brett from the truth, protect the precious band dynamics. He was tired of thinking of others first, putting the delicate band's future ahead of his own happiness. Hayden wanted him and, goddamn it, Theo wanted him too. So what if it split up the band? At least he'd be happy. But the words didn't come. Perhaps Hayden knew what they were going to be and wanted to stop them before they did tear the band apart. Maybe Hayden wasn't quite as selfish and spoilt as Theo had him pegged as being. Maybe. Except it was Hayden who was reaching for him. Pressing his cheek in against the back of the chair, Theo, powerless, imitating his movement. Hayden's eyes hooking his again, drawing him in, luring him closer, inhaling Theo's very essence. And Hayden was the one with a boyfriend - a lover, whatever it was that he called his relationship with Brett. Theo knew how wrong it was to be letting it happen but Hayden was so irresistible. Most of the world would agree. Hayden leaned closer, bringing a hand up to stroke Theo's cheek. He went up with the palm, back down with the back of his hand. Was it just his imagination or was Hayden's touch just a little shy? When the younger man opened his mouth, his bottom lip trembled. He licked his lips again, his goofy teeth forcing those lips to stay slightly parted even when the tongue retreated to its warm bed inside. The fantasies had to stop, Theo decided. They had to become reality or else be put to rest forever. He couldn't take much more of the ache. And not just the one in his groin, which was at least controllable. It was the one in his chest that drove him crazy. The cancerous lump that swelled whenever Hayden was near and screamed out in agony when he was not. There was no rest from it. Only when the keys of the piano were beneath his fingers did the ache retreat to a dull roar. |
"Hayden," Theo tried again. "Hey, guys!" Brett greeted loudly, slamming open the door, his face beaming. Theo jumped backwards, guilt forcing his reflexes. He ripped Hayden's hand from his face, stumbled to his feet. He swallowed and he thought he could taste Hayden's breath on the back of his tongue. Confused, he looked down at the younger man - had they kissed and he was too lovesick to remember? He shook his head, told himself he was acting like a fool, and quickly looked away again. "What's going on?" Brett asked, his voice so very deep. Hurt was in his eyes, confusion and nights of misunderstandings. This wouldn't have been the first time Brett would have caught Hayden with someone else but it was the first time he'd have caught him with a mutual friend. At least that was what Theo thought. Hayden gave a sigh and then looked up at Theo, giving a shrug of his shoulders. What did that mean? Theo wondered. Brett looked across at him and Theo decided he didn't want to wait around to hear what was to come. If an argument happened between the lovers now it would be of his making and he couldn't live with the guilt. "I'm going …" he started, not bothering to finish his sentence as he hurried from the room. "What's going on?" Brett asked again, watching as the door swung shut on Theo's back. He marched forward, hands on hips, staring down at his younger lover, scared and angry all at the same time. "What did I just walk in on?" "Nothing," Hayden said, pouting like a teenager, leg twitching, hands fumbling for the remote control. "Hayden, I'm not an idiot, I know - " "He was upset," Hayden cut in. "Jerome was acting like a dick and The' was upset. I was only talking to him, Brett." He looked up, green eyes swimming in a room full of blandness. "I was only trying to cheer him up. Why do you always have to get at me?" |